Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Top Dogs - Fantasy RPG Mutts

So basically fuck rabbits am I right?


A lot of people I know rescue dogs or foster dogs or volunteer for dogs, nice doggies whose main problem apart from apathy is that we took something which worked the way a shark worked and we made it mutate itself until it was hilarious and then left it like that and oh right BREATHING things need to BREATHE, fuck...

Got me thinking a long time ago about how this'd go in a fantasy world. I mean here the dogs help herd sheep, in a fantasy world all the sheep probably have golden wool and breathe fire! What a country! But more than that. Dwarves would not have fashion dogs, except they would, because being badass is fashion for dwarves. Elves are creepy, capricious dicks so any dogs they made would be soooooo far beneath their notice, who cares if everything about them is fucking creepy too?

I talked a lot with my wife and my coworkers and bounced a few ideas here and there and I started making, at first, a table of these things. Then it got out of hand, to the point where at one point I was going to save up a thou or two and put together a big dog book. Make it look like a magazine, get Katie to put some stories in it, throw in some dog-as-race-class and some magical pet-related classes, some adventure seeds...

Some of that may still happen one day. Bottom line is, first I got busy, and then, since we decided to buy a house, I got broke.

I need to clear some space in my head garage badly right now, though, so here it is: a thing I did with dogs in it.